Watchmen

Director: Zack Snyder
Cast: Billy Crudup, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Matthew Goode and Malin Akerman
DVD release: 30 July 2009
Rated: MA15+

One for the fans

Guilty as charged! This reviewer has not read Alan Moore and Dave Gibbon’s graphic novel on which Watchmen is based, so I’m looking at it purely as a newcomer to the story like many others in the audience. Let’s say that comic strips have become much darker over the years, long removed from the innocent early days of Superman, Mandrake, Buck Rogers, Li’l Abner and rest. In fact Watchmen is so black it makes The Dark Knight look like a bright shining day. It’s said director Zack Snyder has made a faithful adaption of the original. That may be true, but his baby is born in the woolly cocoon of excessive screen time.

It’s 1985 in a dismal alternative America. A vigilante super hero group of misbegotten characters seem to be somewhat out of favour with a government under the leadership of President Nixon (no sign of David Frost). The teaser shows The Comedian (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) one of the aging heroes being unceremoniously tossed out a skyscraper window, along with his smiley badge. The remaining heroes come out of retirement as depressive Rorschach (Jackie Earle Haley) reckons there might be some dodgy horse trading going on, leading to lots of violence and bloodletting.

Dr. Manhatten (Billy Crudup) a blue giant of great wisdom, hurtles off to Mars with his luscious lady Silk Spectre II (Malin Akerman) for some maudlin meditation leaving the world in crisis. For in the developing Cold War, the Soviets are aiming their nuclear warheads at the USA. The doomsday clock is ticking. But there’s a sinister plot afoot. Another nutcase vigilante, Adrian Veidt (Matthew Goode) plans to stop the Ruskies and Yanks going to war in a crackpot way that’s as diabolic as the act of atomic war itself. The world depends on Veidt being stopped from implementing his plan, but is it already too late?

This gang of superheroes are a weird mob escaped from a Uni revue. One wears a white bandage mask which has Rorschach blots circulating for no apparent reason, another is got up in an outfit looking a cast off from Robin in the old campy Batman TV series, a voluptuous chick in a outfit would make Michele Pheiffer blush, a blue full frontal naked bloke with white eyes, a David Bowie clone, and Clark Kent recycled. All a bit silly to the uninitiated, but they must be accurate images from the source material. Then there’s the preposterous dialogue; pretentious for what is really mainly nonsense.

No doubt Zack Snyder (300) directs with serious intent, sadly the result is bogged down in length. His cast try to give some credence to characters swamped by special effects, Billy Crudup (The Good Shepherd) Jeffrey Dean Morgan (Days of Wrath), Matthew Goode (Brideshead Revisited) and Jackie Earle Haley (Winged Creatures) do their best, while Malin Akerman (27 Dresses) provides eye candy. President Nixon (Robert Wisden) wears a putty proboscis making him appear a slightly crazed waxworks replica. The digital effects and cinematography are impressive with exciting and original images often of extreme carnage. These visuals actually carry the movie but even they tire in the long haul to a conclusion.

Iron Man had humour, The Dark Knight had strong performances, Watchmen has two and three-quarter hours of special effects, comic strip story and little else to lift the game. Alan Moore wisely removed his name from the movie; but young fans of the graphic novel will lap it up, because it’s squarely aimed at them.

John Bale

Send us your feedback on this review